Back in November, I wrote this post on being a mom who wears makeup. I got a mixture of reactions on it on my social media channels, mostly Instagram. The most asked question was “why” I choose to spend the time applying makeup instead of spending it with my son. A lot of messages were negative and trying to shame me. Here are thoughts on why we should stop shaming moms for wearing makeup.
WHY I CHOOSE TO WEAR MAKEUP
Like I mentioned above, the question I got asked the most was why I spend the time doing my makeup instead of with Benjamin. This may surprise you, but me becoming a mother did not stop me being who I was before. I still like the same things, I still want the same things. The only difference is that now I have a little human in my life. I choose to continue using makeup, just like I choose to continue blogging or Instagramming. It’s a choice, which seems to be what a lot of people (mostly women) have a problem with. I don’t have to wear makeup, no one is making me do it. I want to do it and I do it for myself! Not for anyone else.
Makeup makes me feel good, it makes me feel put together. It’s not even about feeling pretty or beautiful – although mascara does help. To me, it’s about taking the time to do something for myself. Just like I do when I make a coffee the second Benjamin goes down for a nap and you can betcha I take my time enjoying it! Applying makeup is sort of therapeutical for me, it takes less time for me to do my makeup than writing a blog post from start to finish. But it is just as creative, with the bonus that no one asks me if I am sick when I have makeup on. #palegirlproblems
As you see, there is no huge big reason as to why I choose to wear makeup. It’s just because I want to, I like to and – most importantly – because I can. On days when I don’t have the time or can’t be bothered, I simply don’t put on any makeup. Let’s be honest, who would I do it for, if not myself? Markus is at work all day and Benjamin doesn’t care how I look – as long as I feed him and sit there next to him while he ignores me and plays. And I sure wouldn’t be bothered to apply makeup for the DHL man.
STOP SHAMING MOMS FOR WEARING MAKEUP
There’s this “idea” of what a mom should look like. Old slacks, constantly dirty tops and a look of despair on their faces. Oh and let’s not forget the infamous #mombun! (ironically I am wearing a bun 99% of the time I am at home. Including now) As soon as a mom is wearing makeup on social media she has to belong in one of three categories: either she has a ton of help at home and doesn’t need to take care of anything; she has a “perfect” baby who never cries and is the easiest creature on this planet or she’s basically neglecting and leaves her child crying with a diaper on the verge of exploding.
Irony off, it’s not ok to question why a woman decided to do something just because she’s a mother. I am a mother, but I am also a ton of other things: a
girlfriend fiancé, a good friend, a sarcastic person….the list goes on! Why should mothers (or parents) stop being who they were when they get a baby?
It’s not about makeup either, it can be about going to the gym, doing yoga, having a mani-pedi every appointment every week, going to the hairdressers every 6 months. A mother is also a person and we all should remember that! Besides, I really don’t think the fact that someone wears makeup has any effect on your own life.